


Did You Then?

by ahbuggrit



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Drabble, M/M, Pre-Relationship, bucky watching over steve from afar
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-13
Updated: 2015-03-13
Packaged: 2018-03-17 16:14:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 778
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3535847
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ahbuggrit/pseuds/ahbuggrit
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Black Widow had a few questions for the Winter Soldier about his relationship with Steve Rogers.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Did You Then?

**Author's Note:**

> Once again, unbeta'd and written on mobile (such a pain!)

The Winter Soldier - James Barnes - slouched into a low wooden chair, his gaze directed out of the large Starbucks windows. He wasn't so busy watching his target that he didn't note the redhead stalking towards him, but at the same time, he didn't feel threatened by her presence. She had no backup here and the last thing she was going to do was reveal his location to the target across the street. They both knew that Captain America, that Rogers, was safer not knowing that the body of his childhood friend and sergeant was following him around. He might get the wrong idea.

The Black Widow took the seat opposite him. "You're following him. "

The Soldier didn't reply - no question was asked, no comment needed. He continued to ignore the Widow in favour of watching Rogers. Such a strange person - refusing to defend himself, so goddamn suicidal once his objection on the helicarrier had been achieved. He had been willing to sit back and take a beating. That didn't sit well with the Winter Soldier, he knew that meant there was something wrong with Captain America - with Steve. What was even more frustrating and eerie was how much it had irritated him.

"He's still looking for you. "

His eyes flicked over to the woman across the table. There was no apparent signs of lying, but then again, a woman with her skill set could achieve that with ease.

"He should stop. "

"Still going to hurt him? "

He turned from her raised brow back to watching the man across the street bite into a burger.

"No." T

he conversation ceased as the two watched Rogers and his companion, the former owner of a set of mechanical wings, eat their food in a relaxed fashion, talking all the while.

"You and he... Were you and he together before?"

The question took him by surprise.

"You mean when I was James Barnes? "

"Are you not now?" The Widow's face was expressionless - no curiosity, surprise or anything.

He opted not to answer. He wasn't too sure himself these days. Nights spent with nothing to do were a pain, because those were the nights his brain decided that dumping fractures of memories, small, sharp and painful like shrapnel, into his head was a good idea. Not much from his time as a brainwashed POW slave came back to him - probably because those memories were wiped away soon after. Instead he was haunted with his former life. His time in the army, fighting Nazis,hadn't been pleasant, even after Steve joined him. Especially after Steve joined - on top of worrying about his friend and his penchant fire running into the line of fire, Barnes had also been dealing with the trauma of Zola's experiments and anxiety over the changes he had noted on his body.

His fragmented memories of life in New York hurt less so. He tended to experience nostalgia and melancholy more with his earlier memories - memories of one to many dinners of boiled salted pork and cabbage; working as a shoe shiner, and later down in the docks; of a tiny, sometimes sick boy arguing to go out in the cold, to climb trees; of dance halls and girls with pretty lipstick and swirling dresses. The Soldier found himself wondering why he mostly felt bittersweet over the dance hall memories.

"Are you going to answer my question?"

"We... weren't." Even to his own ears his answer lacked conviction. Surprise flickered through the Black Widow's eyes. "

Really? Why not?"

For the first time since she joined him, his face shifted - his brows contracted together and his mouth pursed slightly. 

Did he... Had he? Was that why the dance hall memories with Steve alone by the wall were so bittersweet?

Oh.

"A fella being with a fella... Some woulda minded their own business, kept out of it. But there was always the risk. He woulda been an easy target and he wouldn't have backed down. They'd have killed him."

Cue a short silence between the two.

"What about you?"

"I could handle myself."

Maybe not against to many, but the Winter Soldier realised that he'd always been a fighter. They hadn't made him like that. He'd always fought. The US army just took it one step further and made him a killer.

"Did you want to?"

"... I don't know."

"I think he did." The Black Widow shifted her piercing gaze to Rogers, where it softened. "Don't know if he still does, what with you shooting him and all. But he wants to help. Make it easy on us and just come in."

And with that, she left the Winter Soldier thinking,  _should I?_

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!


End file.
